Category Archives: …The Hell Is This?
Taking A Shat
Apparently The Adaptive Curmudgeon hates everyone with such a passion he would drop a raccoon turd on your dinner plate if he could, but since he doesn’t have a couple billion of the masked critters to aim and squeeze at Dollar Menu entrees, he posted this instead –
It was moderately amusing for me (for me, for meee), but then I find things like Late Night Mistakes and Batman vs. Donkey Kong to be High Art, so I don’t think I qualify as an arbiter of crimes against culture. In fact, I’m quite likely a repeat offender.
Which is a good enough segue as any to drop these classy bits from LNM…
The Swiss Black Market Has Nothing On Wisconsin
[Or: “Hot Cheese”]
Did April Fool’s show up a few days early this year…?
Man found with $200K in stolen cheese, police say
One man is facing criminal charges in New Jersey after detectives found a truck he was driving with roughly $200,000 worth of stolen Muenster cheese from Wisconsin.
Veniamin Konstantinovich Balika, 34, of Plainfield, Ill., was arrested at the Vince Lombardi Service Area off the New Jersey Turnpike. New Jersey State Police Detective 1 Oliver Sissman said he allegedly provided false paperwork to the distributor of K&K Cheese in Cashton last week to get the 42,000 pounds of cheese loaded onto his 18-wheel truck.
No spur-of-the-moment cheese theft is this. The guy did some work to prepare for his escapade. He was planning to sell it under market value to some East Coast retailers. Cheese for cheese, I suppose.
Occupied Like A Men’s Room
I’ve had a half-written post for a while now about how the comics I read as a kid have become utterly unsuitable for kids today. I was going to finish it up and post it this week. I still plan to do that, but today I saw this.
DC Comics Turns Occupy Movement Into a Superhero Title
Eighteen months after the phrase first entered the collective public consciousness, the plight of the 99 percent is coming to mainstream superhero comics — via a new series from the second biggest publisher in the American comic industry, which just happens to be a subsidiary of a multi-national corporation that makes around $12 billion a year. Irony, anybody?
In May, DC Comics will launch two new series taking place in their mainstream superhero universe that offer different insights into the class struggle in a world filled with superheroes, alien races and inexplicable events. The Green Team, written by Tiny Titans and Superman Family Adventures creators Art Baltazar and Franco, with art by Ig Guara, revives an obscure 1975 concept about teenage rich kids who try to make the world a better place with their outrageous wealth. In an interview promoting the series, Franco promised that it would address questions like “Can money make you happy?” and “If you had unlimited wealth, could you use that to make the lives of people better?”
…But while DC is promoting The Green Team series as the adventures of the “1%,” its companion title, The Movement, is teased as a chance for us to “Meet the 99%… They were the super-powered disenfranchised — now they’re the voice of the people!”
…Only time will tell whether The Movement will live up to the subversive examples of these earlier books, or just end up a well-intentioned piece of topical super heroics that trades on, and commodifies, a real political movement.
I read some of Gail Simone’s work several years ago – she’s a good writer when she wants to be, but she’s bought into a significant amount of the feminist/progressive worldview. I know nothing about the people working on the other book. Both books sound like what the columnist called “pre-packaged populist rebellion.”
Quit It Or Hit It!
Meant to post this a couple days ago…
Father hires virtual hitmen to assassinate his layabout son in video game world
It didn’t work.
Beer Fire
From Late Night Mistakes, one of the greatest sites ever invented, ever. Flaming Moe has nothin’ on this.
Yes, two “evers.” It’s that awesome.
They Were Out Of Factory Originals
[Or: “Were The Serial Numbers Filed Off?”]
I love Kids Prefer Cheese. To wit –
Arguably the worst journalistic lede ever.
She lost a womb but gained a penis.
Unfortunately, the article is not as exciting as the lede would imply (short of spontaneous involuntary sex-change, how could it be?). An anesthesiologist is charged with sexually assaulting 20 women while they were sedated. Or, as the next line helpfully explains, “The former was being removed surgically — full hysterectomy — while the latter was forcibly shoved into her slack mouth.”
I have no idea if this story is true. There are some flags in the story, and at least one commenter on Gawker has argued that the procedure wouldn’t be carried out as described in the article.
The best part, though, is the guy’s name. George Doodnaught.
Doodnaught. If this story is actually true, you couldn’t make up a better name. Sounds like a mandroid pimpbot from some XXX Star Trek parody. A Doodnaught would fit perfectly into an “art film” involving spontaneously sex-changing aliens. Who would, of course, gleefully sleep with Captain Kock.
Photobombed
The 20 Worst Photos Ever Taken According To Google
I have to wonder if some of them were photoshopped…
Others, I can only hope they were.






