High Resolution Screening

 

Dannyfrom504 wrote

…a song by red house painters called “medicine bottle”. medicine bottle was one of my staple “oneitis” songs. yet i recently had it pop up on a playlist and listening to it now…i see it from a different angle.

it’s simply about an introvert who’s in love but his lover can’t get him out of is shell (mark kozelek routinely wrote songs that were autobiographical), i’m thinking she’s of the impression that he’s not really all that into her, or can’t deal with his gloominess (and we INTJ’s can be GLOOMY AS FUCK), and leaves him. but what she doesn’t get, is the fact she he let her in in the first place is how we express our affection. we are solid pillars of stone when it come to our feelings. NO ONE gets in unless we’ve screened you beyond any screening you’ve ever experienced.

I took the Myers-Briggs test – two different versions – and both times I scored as an INTJ. One test rated me at 90% Thinking over Feeling.  I  don’t think it’s quite that high, but I am definitely always thinking and analyzing.

I screen constantly and automatically. Everyone does, but INTJs take it to 11. As far as online interactions go, I’m scanning everything you write, watching how you choose your words, who you reply to most and who you ignore. I’m studying your general attitude, what makes you laugh and what pisses you off. I’m scoping out your friends. By the time I leave a comment on your site, I’ve probably read at least half of your posts, and probably seen your comments on other sites. If you comment here and I don’t know you, I’ll go read your latest batch of posts before replying.

I’m not saying I shut out strangers. Far from it. I’ll talk music, movies, and the like with total strangers anytime. But there’s a limit to how far I’ll let someone in before I really know them, and that limit doesn’t go very deep. I discuss little about my personal views until I know someone.

I rarely email someone out of the blue, and always with my WordPress name at first. If I give you my Skype name, you’re on a short list. If you know my name, you’re in a very small club. If you can send me a text message on my phone, you’re probably gold, but it takes a while to get to that level (and besides, why would most people even need to text me? But I digress…).

The thing is, if I do give these out to someone, they usually don’t realize what it means. Once I’ve decided someone is in, I tend to hand out more personal things, not like candy on Halloween, but without hard restrictions. There’s no context to show how how guarded I can be. To a non-INTJ, it probably looks like I’m open (maybe too open), but it actually means I’ve decided you’re up to snuff. Not that anyone would know this. So I have to watch myself.

Interacting with someone in person is different, of course. But that’s a subject for anyone who actually meets me in person.

Danny also wrote “sad depressing music is an INTJ’s heroin.” I’m not quite sure about that, but I do have my share of unhappy favorites. Even as a kid, I never cared much for most love songs – I might like some for the music, but the lyrics were usually too sappy for me. A song doesn’t have to be unhappy, but over-romanticized fluff is right out. Here’s a few favorites of mine, to give you an idea.

Ok, I like some happy songs too.

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About nightskyradio

Random signals from nowhere in particular.

Posted on February 18, 2013, in ♫ ♪ ♫, Life and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink. 13 Comments.

  1. My favorite love songs are folksy –

    • I can’t really get into folky songs. I got nothing against them, it’s just not my thing. I seem to recall I did like one of her songs, couldn’t tell you the name of it though.

      Now this is what I like in a love song.

    • Too hipster. Sounds like a cutesy car commercial. I’m afraid I need a palate cleanser after less than a minute of that…

  2. thanks for the linkage. stay up.

  3. That was really nicely written. In any given social group, I tend to gravitate toward good humored cynics, skeptics and atheists, deadpan humorists, and irreverent (but not mean-natured) sardonic types, often with a philosophical and spiritual (but not necessarily theistic) bent, and a somewhat dark but not depressing outlook. Some of these categories are redundant, of course.

    I like the music! I did Josie over at my blog but only rediscovered it because through your influence.

    (If anyone wants to go dark music-wise, try Mahler’s 9th sometime.)

    • That explains why you’re hanging around here. Except for the atheist part, that’s pretty much how I am.

      “Josie” is an excellent song. Pretty much everything by Steely Dan is cynical, sardonic, deadpan and dark, although sometimes they do veer into outright depressing stuff.

      • I don’t get the dark from Steely Dan. I get a definite lift and kick from the harmonies and arrangements. But it’s probably because I’m horrible with lyrics. I usually don’t have much of an idea what they are unless I go look um up.

        Hmm . . . “Drink scotch whisky all night long, and die behind the wheel.”

        I suppose that might, in a certain light, be seen as somewhat less than completely positive in outlook if one were to stop and give it careful consideration. Yesssss . . .

  4. Its slightly intimidating to think there are people who analyze people as much (or more) than I do. I’d hate to think of being under my own microscope.

  5. A perceptive person can tell a lot about someone by what they say, reading between the lines and also feeling the emotion behind the words. And by the music they post!

  6. Being an INTJ (90% introverted, 80% thinking) I can very much relate to this post. I have never let anyone really know my feelings or deeper thoughts, neither family nor friends. My is personality best summed up by the commenter wdyfae. As for the sad/depressing music part which danny wrote, I do not like it too dark just more melancholy.

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